Vengeance is Mine...Or Not

(This is a human interest piece that I had to write to promote a one act play of mine that is having a reading done at the Bloomington Playwrights Project.)

Every play I have ever written can be attributed to a moment when I was angry with someone or something. Though I have always found great joy in writing for the sheer amusement of it, writing has always been a therapeutic outlet for me as well. One of my favorite film quotes is, “I will eviscerate you in fiction.” Yes. When I write a play it is usually the equivalent to me throwing a spear at someone. Or at least that’s how it started out until I wrote my one act play Russ Miles. I’ll admit it. When I wrote this play it was an artistic attempt to expose a certain individual for the low-down monster that he is. It took me about a month to write the first draft of this one act and when it was complete I was immensely satisfied with my spear throwing. Then came the moment where the University Players at Indiana University wished to do a staged reading of the play. Excellent I thought. Now there can be witnesses to my spear throwing and revenge shall be mine. Imagine my surprise then when I found the audience laughing at my dramatic play (but in a good way.) And what good way was that? They were laughing at how pathetic the main character Russ was. This individual was so horrible, so disturbed that he warranted public mockery. Oh, yes. Revenge was sweet…until the end of the play. Russ eventually puts the final nail in his coffin and at that moment people at the reading stopped laughing and could only watch on in horror and pity. And that’s when it hit me. That’s when my motives for writing plays changed forever. I was able to see this “monster” through my audience’s eyes and what I saw was someone that was so lost, so miserable that he did not deserve my hate, mockery, or fictional annihilation but only my pity. As I watched this man’s descent into his own personal Hell I couldn’t help but be reminded of Deuteronomy 32:35 “It is mine to avenge; I will repay. In due time their foot will slip; their day of disaster is near and their doom rushes upon them.” Sounds a bit melodramatic, I know but it helped me let go. I realized that there is no point in harboring anger, there is no point in seeking vengeance. Give a bad person enough rope and they’ll hang themselves. It’s inevitable. All someone can do is forgive and get away from that person.

I still am inspired by anger and injustice but my goal is now different. Instead of seeking revenge I now seek forgiveness. By writing the person or the scenario that upset me I am able to see things from a different perspective and therefore accept, forgive, and move on because harboring resentment is no way to live.